To Learn, You Must Unlearn

Though I know to grow, a n* gotta learn to let go
-Common, “The Food” from the Album Be

Learning is a dangerous thing. Every time you learn something, you take two steps forward. Progress, right? Not so fast. For every two steps forward that you take after learning something, you also take one step back. It’s this backwards step that often goes unnoticed and unrecognized, and subsequently becomes an obstacle to our growth and progress.

So what exactly is this backwards step? How can learning something be both good and bad? Isn’t learning a good thing? Not always! Think of all the harmful and negative things that can be learned:

• you can learn to hate those in a specific group, whether that group is political, social, economic, religious, or of a specific ethnicity, culture, or gender
• you can learn bad habits
• you can learn harmful ideas
• you can learn and come to believe ideas that aren’t actually true, decreasing your chances of succeeding in life

Because life itself and the society we live in are not perfect, some of us have probably learned things that hold us back. This is the 4th bulletpoint category of learning that I want to discuss.
It’s human nature to come to conclusions, as we need to formulate belief systems and “truths” about life in order to function properly and make intelligent decisions. We begin learning these “truths” from a very young age. We are probably learning things even as babies, observing the world around us and drawing conclusions about how to function. Food – in mouth. Woman – love and safety. Four-legged creature – safe and friendly. That is hopefully the experience that every baby has, but alas, life is not perfect and we can learn the wrong things from our experiences.

Some beliefs and ideas I learned that I had to later challenge and “unlearn” include:

• that I didn’t have the talent required to make my own album
• that I was destined to end up like my father
• that I couldn’t do xyz because of my upbringing or because of my ethnicity
• that because success at some pursuit didn’t come naturally, I should give up because I’d never be good at it
• that others really gave a damn about I did

And that’s just scratching the surface. If I had a dime for every limiting belief I had, I’d be a rich man. That is, as long as I had unlearned those limiting beliefs, because they prevent us from reaching our full potential. I’m not trying to tell you that you can do anything; you and I are both too smart for that self-hype psychobabble. Rather, the idea is that neither of us know exactly what we are indeed capable of. We can’t predict the future, and yet when it comes to predicting our own failures, we suddenly become Nostradamus and start making prophecies. No one knows what you are capable of, not even yourself. The only way to find out is to unlearn any limiting beliefs that you’ve picked up over the years, summon the courage to try (and possibly fail), and pick yourself up again and keep on trying. You never know until you try.

As I previously mentioned, I’m no stranger to limiting beliefs. In fact, I am probably within 5-10% of the population that is exceptionally good at doubting themselves and playing Negative Nostradamus. Don’t ask me how I’ve made it as far as I’ve had with all these anchors weighing me down, because I honestly don’t know. But I do know that with each anchor I cast off, I allow myself room to experiment, to try and to fail, and grow as a person and explore what my potential is.

Challenge your conception of who you are. Re-examine your beliefs – do you really know what the truth is? Do you frequently make negative prophecies about your future? If you aren’t already playing the stock market, then quit with the Negative Nostradamus because you obviously don’t know what the future will bring. Think about the conclusions you’ve come to about yourself and your potential. Are you short-changing yourself? If so, then unlearn what you need to unlearn, get out there, and find out what happens. It only takes one limiting belief to hold you back from being successful.